“This will never work” thought Mark, remembering the argument they has had after he bought that jacket last week. Trying to agree a joint budget was just going to set a new record for the biggest number of arguments in one evening!

Tom would explode in anger, Christine would retreat into an impenetrable fortress with walls of cold silence. Both wished deep down that they could find a better way to react. Eventually they did.  

We thought they where the perfect couple, but they said they still worked hard on their marriage.

They told us that they had started kept one evening free a week to be with each other. If they didn’t feel to tired they would read to each other.

Mark was in a rush. Helen was tired.

Why, they both wondered, had they tried to discuss this now?

Neither of them wanted to make the effort required to listen well and speak considerately.

So the discussion was doing more harm than good.

Thank goodness one of them had the sense to suggest making a date, when they could give it the time it needed.

The hero and the heroin get on so easily, Mark thought to himself, like they were made for each other. But this is such hard work. Perhaps Helen and I aren’t a good match after all.

But then Mark thought of a verse he had read “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9). The word “work” struck him. He began to wonder if his expectations had been wrong.

“Maybe”, he thought, “If it’s hard work, I’m doing it right!”  

Author's favorite related quotes:

“Marriage has been the hardest thing I have ever done, and it’s been the making of me”, John Hart, retired missionary.

"If you are capable of growing into the largeness of marriage, do it." Jesus, Matt 19:12 in the Message paraphrase.